I'm pretending to be...

...a real estate agent today. This afternoon my mom and I are going to our old house and I have to take pictures and create an ad to sell their house. My dad made one and I looked at it and said "You need help." I mean, I watch a lot of HGTV, I know these things.

So I plan on taking more/better pictures and measuring the rooms so we can advertise the dimensions because they are HUGE. Like, I am fairly certain two of the bedrooms equals more than the entire square footage of my old townhouse.

When I re-do the ad I will eliminate my dad's random, odd capitalization. Oh, totally forgot to tell you this the other day. I think it was Thursday night and I went to bed and turned the lights off of course. I'm sprawled there, in a dark room, for maybe thirty-five minutes. Then my mom opens the door and says "are you asleep?" No. I'm not. Obviously. She says "how do you spell 'remodeled'? It doesn't have two Ls does it?" Absolutely not. I tell her how to spell it, and then she shuts the door, and I roll over at my fourth attempt of getting comfortable. Apparently I am the (nearly) sleeping dictionary. There's this thing on your computer called spell check....

I told my mom I charge a 1% commission on all homes I sell. She said maybe she'd let me store my childhood crap in a closet at their house for 3-5 years. I said deal.