Personal Assistant position open

So yesterday I told you I would for sure go to Panda Express for dinner the next day (today). Well, after posting yesterday I searched for the nutritional facts for my favorite foods at Panda. The results? Devastating. Pretty much you need to immediately divide your meal in half, because if you don't you are eating a whole heck of a lot of calories. I felt a little bit guilty, especially considering I am getting re-measured in like three weeks (using that free personal trainer session that I won), and I am hoping to make my body fat percentage go down. That doesn't happen by eating at Panda Express.

Regardless of all these facts, I went to Panda for dinner, because it was free using my gift card. While I was there, I met a very friendly two year old. As soon as I got in line behind her, she asked me my name. Then she asked "Where's your mom at?" I told her my mom was at home. "Why?" She just is, I sad. "Do you have money to buy food?" I nodded. She talked a bit more bit it was unintelligible. But all this from a two year old. Seriously. Very outgoing.

Also, my super long teacher meeting was kind of worth it because I won a free book for my class library! I am on a winning streak. Plus, last time we had a teacher meeting I won one of the door prizes. Yes!

While at the teacher meeting I had to put on my Bachelor earmuffs, because at the table next to me some girls were talking and I heard "I wish he would have picked Jillian." Immediately I put my hands over my ears and hummed to myself because I knew they were talking about The Bachelor, and I hadn't watched last night's episode yet. I didn't want the suspense to be ruined. BTW, I lied yesterday when I said it was the finale. It wasn't. It was "the women tell all," which I think is stupid because I don't care about the women and their drama. Who cares that Erica hates Megan? Or that Natalie (not my roommate) was materialistic? Nobody really cares, it is just a filler. But I am going to watch it anyway because, well, I am that pathetic.

Good news, my computer is fixed and I get to pick it up tomorrow. We'll see if it really is healthy once I get it home and try to do things on it.

Today I delegated an inconvenient task and it worked out great! I really need a personal assistant. I am supposed to go to a baby shower tomorrow at a different school for my mentor teacher that I had during the ed program. She just had a baby and it was premature, so the shower was kind of a last minute notification. Anyway, I realized last night that I wouldn't be able to go shopping for a gift today after school because I had to go to West Salem to the meeting, and then I didn't want to have to drive to Target or wherever after that. And I wouldn't have time tomorrow because the shower is right after school. So I called my mom this morning, because very conveniently she comes to Salem every Tuesday for Bible study. I called and asked her if she would be able to buy a gift and card and leave it in my trunk at school by 3:30, so I would have it for tomorrow. She said she probably could, so I left a check in my trunk at 8am, and at 3:45 I checked my trunk before leaving to West Salem, and there was a bag in there and some change. Perfect! Love delegating time sucking tasks.

It gets even better. Not only will the present be a surprise for Beth (the new mother), but it was a surprise for me because I was like "what am I going to get her? What will Mom pick out?" I am giving Beth and her new baby girl some organic bibs and burp cloths, and a super soft pink blanket. All I have to do is wrap it and write on the card that my mom also picked out. I love personal shoppers!

I think a personal assistant would be very helpful. The position is currently open. These are the tasks that my PA would need to perform:
make my bed every morning
make my lunch and breakfast
grade my student's papers and record the score in the grade book
plan units for social studies and science (gather info, book sources, etc)
reply to the 67 e-mails I get a day at my work address, because I never do
mail that thing back to my insurance agency
cook me delicious vegetarian dinners
do my laundry!
clean my car once a week
finish my taxes and mail them in (I already did the hard part, once I found out I owed money, I stopped).
Oh, I'd also have them upload all my music back on iTunes once I get my computer back.

This would really free up a lot of time for me. I wonder how much I would have to pay someone in order for them to do this stuff. What do you think is reasonable? I think I would prefer a dollar amount for a competed task, instead of an hourly rate. I don't want a slacker. Like, if I paid a person $1 each time to make my bed, that calculates out to $12 an hour, because it only takes five minutes to make the bed. But its five minutes I don't have in the morning.

Seriously, this could work. I'd put an ad on Craigslist, but then we all know who would find me. HR! (In case you were living in a dark cave and didn't know that already).