How my sister likes to displace me

This is completely fictional, so that you know. It's from a dream I had. And okay, I know sharing dreams is super lame, because nobody cares, but whatever. I thought it was funny. It also explains why I didn't feel like eating breakfast when I woke up.

Dream:
We're sitting in my family's old camper, getting ready to go to bed. When I was little, I got to sleep on the table after we folded it down, and my sister slept on the pull-down bunk above. But now Travis, whom I refer to as my fake brother (he's my brother-in-law), is with us, and Jess and him want to sleep on the table.

"I'm not sleeping in the bunk. The table is mine. It's been mine for years. This is my spot," I argue.

It made a lot of sense while it was happening, but I typically am not one to volunteer to sleep on an eating surface, especially one made of laminated wood. And okay, I sound really unyielding, but let's just keep in mind how Christmas Eve went down last year.

True Story:
For years and years, my sister would snuggle into my bed with me on Christmas Eve. We even continued this through my college years, because what happened was my sister was living in an apartment, and I was living in a dorm room, and we would both return to my parents' house for Christmas. The only bed left at my parents' house was my old bed in my room, so my sister was forced to snuggle in next to me even when she was 22 years old. And then Travis came along.

The first Christmas he spent with us, he drove over in the morning. The second Christmas he spent with us, my mother made him sleep on a roll-out mat in the sitting room (which no one ever sits in). The third Christmas, he was married to my sister. The two of them wanted to sleep in my bed in my room, and they wanted me to sleep on the roll-out mat in the sitting room.

I absolutely refused on two accounts: 1) It was my freaking room, and 2) the sitting room is actually very eerie at night, because it is a room full of windows, specially designed to enjoy the view of Mt. Hood. And here, they want the one single person to sleep alone in a creepy room with creepy windows, so creepy elves can peer in at me during the night? Hell no. So what happened was, Travis and Jess slept on roll-out mats in the sitting room together. You might be like, why didn't they just sleep at their own house and come over in the morning? My friend, they didn't because my sister and I are desperately clinging to our childhood tradition of waking up at 6:30 in the morning to see what Santa brought. If they had to drive 40 minutes in the morning, they wouldn't have arrived until 11am or something. It's totally different when the presents aren't at your actual house. You don't want to wake up then.

Anyway. Back to the fictional part of this story, the part about me refusing to give up my place on the table. You can understand better now. I give an inch, she takes a mile. Well, the next morning, I wake up in a sleeping bag on the table, and my sister is next to me with a paper sack from McDonald's. She's munching on fries. For breakfast.
"Where did you get that?" I ask. Because, you know, we're camping in the wilderness and everything.
"From McDonald's."
Duh. "But when?"
"Last week."
VOMIT! My sister is eating fries out of a bag from McDonald's that she bought days ago. So disgusting. What I do next is wake up in real life and not eat anything until 2:20 in the afternoon.




P.S. I have no idea what is going to happen this year on Christmas Eve. My mother has turned my old bedroom into a guest room, on account of how I don't live there at all any more. She re-painted, made me clear out all my stuff, moved in new furniture, and hung up new artwork. There is one full-sized bed in there. What I want to have happen is I sleep in it with my sister on Christmas Eve, and Travis sleeps on the roll-out mat in the sitting room, where he can battle the creepy elf eyes peering in through the windows by himself. But my sister will be pushing to put me on a mat by myself so I can cry my lonely tears at night. I'd sleep in the living room on the couch where it is all cozy and Christmasy, but then you know, I'd wake up when Santa comes. Maybe I'll have to fill the bathtub up with pillows and sleep in there, because at least there is only one window, and it's frosted.