Thursday, October 9, 2008

How I could die but prob. not

You know how people who are overly stressed out can either lose a lot of weight or gain a lot of weight? Not that I am saying my life sucks way more than yours or anything, but I have to say I am a bit surprised that my physical appearance does not yet match my ragged mental state.

Because now I do things like forget to eat breakfast. I will pack it, but then misplace it when I get to school and totally forget about it till I ship my kids off to music class or whatever. Then I'll be like "Why am I so hungry. Oh wait, I forgot to eat." Then at lunch time, I'll only have 15 minutes to feed my face, so I won't always eat everything I've packed since I don't have the time.

Additionally, I think I need to be put on sleep medication. But nothing too crazy, because I don't want to have an accidental overdose like Heath Ledger (bless his soul). I cannot sleep for more than 5 or 6 hours straight anymore (minus last Saturday). I keep waking up before my alarm is supposed to go off, or I wake up in the middle of the night. Do I have bags under my eyes? Let me know.

Anyway, so physically I am feeling like I could collapse at any moment, which is why I am slightly surprised that when I look in the mirror, I appear fine. Last week I weighed myself just to see if I was on my way to really dying, or if I was still healthy. I had lost 2.6 pounds, which sort of seemed like a lot. But then I weighed myself today to see if the pattern was continuing, and if I would be deathly ill by the end of the month. But I gained 0.6 of it back, so I figured I was fine. Then I put on a sweater and weighed myself again, and I was 100%.

I have had a horrible sore throat for like a week, and I probably should go meet my new doctor, but I haven't--mostly due to the fact that I haven't picked one yet. Trying to find a new doctor is like trying to find a boyfriend, all of the good ones seem to be taken. All I know is I don't want this guy. He's one of my my choices, but I just don't want him poking at me. Sorry if you know this person, but I just can't do it. Mostly because I think his hair is fake. And I don't really trust that mustache.
If you know any good doctors, let me know. In the meantime, I will continue to eat cough drops like candy, sleep sporadically, and forget meals. That's just the way it is right now.

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